Thursday, December 9, 2010

Church Drama

By Mister Curie
So Madame Curie recently published a rather lengthy and comprehensive account of recent Church drama on her blog.  If you are interested in knowing the details, feel free to check out her blog at

Largely, this relates to points 12 and 13 from my "Update" post from a couple of days ago.

Basically, what it boils down to is this:

After being stalked by the missionaries and then having a visit with the Bishop and First Counselor of the ward, Madame Curie noticed some blog traffic from the Philadelphia area.  We are now watching carefully for visits to our blogs from the Philadelphia area (including suburbs).  So, if this refers to you, dear reader, please email or post in the comments to let Madame Curie know who you are, particularly if you think we know you. If we don't know you, please at least anonymously comment and tell us we have nothing to fear from you (we recognize there are valid reasons to want to be anonymous beyond gathering juicy tidbits of information for excommunication proceedings). Currently Madame Curie cannot rest peacefully at night due to worrying, please alleviate her fears. We will happily respond to any requests for more information from you in public or in private.


  1. Well, I don't fall into the "worrying" category, anyway, since I live in the Boston area ;-) But I had a couple of thoughts and questions. First, I know what it's like to be "outed" to your family via your blog. It's really pretty horrible. So, as far as that perspective goes, I get it. Where I'm confused, I guess--and I imply no judgment by this, I'm just stupid--is why, if your connection to the blog isn't a secret, and you're not trying to hide your feelings about the church, this is such a big deal? It seems to me that putting things on FB is a sure way to let the world know about them. Sad, but true. And, if you're willing to show the Bishop (who sounds like a d-bag, sorry) your blog...I guess I just don't get it.

    Which, not that I need to; this is your business, and not mine. But as a long-time reader of your blog, I feel a lot of affection toward you both and would like, from that perspective, to gain a deeper understanding of what you're talking about. But, if you feel this question is offensive or inappropriate, please feel free to ignore it.

  2. Hey C.J. -

    There are a few reasons why I am paranoid about this whole situation.

    1. Not everyone knows that Mr. C and I are gay. Although our blogs link to Facebook, Facebook doesn't link from the blog. My letter on Facebook strictly discussed my lack of belief in the church - not my sexual orientation.

    We actually have quite a few measures in place to protect Mister C's family from reading our blog posts or knowing about our blogs. And I am not too excited about the ward all knowing that we are both gay. I get enough gawking from internet folks hoping to see a train wreck in progress in our marriage.

    2. The bishopric threatened discipline on me. And then they dropped the issue. If the Stake is scouring my blog trying to cull up dirt on me, I want to know. As it is, I worry somewhat less now that I have plans to leave the Church, mostly as a result of this entire situation.

    Hope that answers your questions!

  3. Initially, I had something of the same situation; I occasionally posted things from my blog on FB. I figured, everyone I was FB friends with (and that wasn't that many people) was really a friend, so it wasn't a huge risk. After my own internet disaster, I set up a FB page for my blog, and communicated with people that way. I discovered the hard way that it only takes one person to really and truly **** up your life.

    I'm sorry you're both going through this.

    A train wreck in progress? Some people's hypocrisy astonishes me. As if so-called "normal" Mormon marriages were so happy. I think if people are hoping to see a train wreck, they're really hoping for confirmation that their choices--the same choices that leave them miserably unhappy--are the right ones, despite not feeling right, or bringing any goodness into their lives.

    A certain brand of person always responds with anger and jealousy to the idea that people can deviate from the norm and *still* be happy.

  4. I'm not from there, but I do wish you the best of luck dealing with it all, I hope the stake isn't creepy blog-stalking :/ I'm sorry that your bishop sucks


  5. Hi Mister Curie and Madame Curie.
    I am told by my wife's Girlfriend who lives in Salt Lake City that she is always being pestered by the missionaries as well for not attending church as well as the visiting teachers and relief society sisters continuely bombarding her with WHY IS SHE NOT ATTENDING!
    I think resigning is the answer to stop all these visits, because then it is final once you have done that and they hopefully will leave you both alone so you can live your life the way you want.When we left the church here in Australia, we resigned asking for our names to be removed from the church records, and have never had one visit to try to convince us we were making a mistake leaving the church.My wife's family are staunch mormons here in Australia and Utah. I guess we were lucky that we are in Oz and the family have never made comment. Stay Happy and focussed guys on living your life as there is a life after mormonism and we are all living it..with happiness.