Bisexuality

By Mister Curie

One clue to my-sexuality not being strictly heterosexuality was alluded to by Madam Curie in a post that has now disappeared by her request, but will probably reappear at some point in time. I had been reading a blog post about human sexuality which cited a scientific article stating that while women could be bisexual, men were primarily either heterosexual or homosexual and that they largely lacked the capacity to be bisexual. Interestingly, I followed links in the comments on my wife's Jan 1 blog post to a very similar article, titled Straight, Gay or Lying? Bisexuality Revisited.

From the article:

In the new study, a team of psychologists directly measured genital arousal patterns in response to images of men and women. . . .Using a sensor to monitor sexual arousal, the researchers found what they expected: gay men showed arousal to images of men and little arousal to images of women, and heterosexual men showed arousal to women but not to men. . . .The psychologists found that men who identified themselves as bisexual were in fact exclusively aroused by either one sex or the other, usually by other men. . . .about three-quarters of the group had arousal patterns identical to those of gay men; the rest were indistinguishable from heterosexuals.

The titled summed up the studies findings, "You're either gay, straight or lying". I knew that I had experienced some attraction for the male body, but I had always explained it away somehow. Now, science seemed to be telling me that if I experienced arousal in response to the male body, I could no longer be grouped with the heterosexuals (as a scientist myself, I tend to listen to science). The implications of the study really bothered me (I was still TBM at the time) and I thought about it a lot and looked into other studies, most with similar findings. Eventually I let it go by focusing on my Celestial marriage, knowing that I found it fully satisfying, and self-righteously congratulating myself that despite any feelings I had, I could be exhalted in the Celestial Kingdom because I hadn't acted on those feelings, and now I could see that acting on homosexuality really was a "choice." Paradoxically, at the same time I refused to believe I was homosexual (hey, we all know TBMs aren't always logical) so it didn't matter anyways.

Since the disaffection, I've had to readdress my understanding and stance on these issues. I wonder if I am bisexual, despite what science is currently seeming to stay. While visiting another blog earlier today, I came across the joking response to professed bisexuality of "Bi now, gay later." (Obviously referencing "Buy now, pay later"). So what is bisexuality and does it really exist?

From Wikipedia:

Bisexuality is sexual behavior or an orientation involving physical or emotional attraction to both males and females. . . .Despite misconceptions, bisexuality does not require that a person be attracted equally to both sexes. In fact, people who have a distinct but not exclusive preference for one sex over the other may still identify themselves as bisexual.

Of course, a lot of this could just be labels and their inevitable breakdown in the messiness of life. As I learned in medical school and as Wikipedia notes later:

Sexual attraction and/or behavior may not necessarily be consistent with identity. Some individuals may identify themselves as homosexual or bisexual without having had any sexual experience. Others have had homosexual experiences but do not consider themselves to be gay, lesbian, or bisexual.

So, am I just lying when I consider myself bisexual? Or is "bisexual" inevitably as flawed a label as any that we try to use when understanding life? I can't deny my attraction for the male body, but certainly nearly 6 years of sexual attraction for my wife and a fantastic sex life where I have never had to resort to male imagery in order to perform (and the fact that I never thought of myself as homosexual) would argue for some level of bisexuality. However, my only response to the poster on another blog who said "Bi now, gay later" was "could be, could be . . ."